During World War II, Hellboy as an infant child was summoned from Hell by Nazis looking for an edge in the latter days of the war. He was instead adopted by the US, and raised under the auspices of the Bureau for Paranormal Research and Defence (an agency founded by Hellboy's adoptive father Trevor Bruttenholm, played by Ian McShane) to help fend off paranormal threats. One such threat comes in the form of an ancient medieval sorceress named Nimue, the Queen of Blood (Milla Jovovich) who was betrayed by her coven, beheaded by King Arthur and dismembered by both Merlin and his King in fifth century England. King Arthur then ordered that the various parts of Nimue's body - her head, her arms, her legs and torso be secured in separate iron crates and taken to various far reaching parts of England never to be unearthed again.
We then fast forward to England via Tijuana where the now adult Hellboy (David Harbour) gets into a wrestling match with a former colleague that has turned Vampire. Hellboy reluctantly kills the Vampire in the ring by impaling him on a post, and in his last dying moments turns back into his human form warning that the apocalypse is coming.
A few weeks later, Hellboy returns to the B.P.R.D HQ in America whereupon he is dispatched to England by his father, and in particular the Osiris Club (an ancient English outfit dedicated to uncovering supernatural mysteries) to hunt down and dispense with three giants who have been running amok across the English countryside. Hellboy joins the giant hunters but is ultimately betrayed by them in an ambush. However, the giants arrive and slaughter the hunters leaving Hellboy to fend off the giants and overthrow each of them, which he does of course using his particular set of skills.
In the meantime, Gruagach (Stephen Graham and Douglas Tait), a hog like beast who has a score to settle with Hellboy seeks advice from Baba Yaga (Emma Tate and Troy James), a one eyed ancient witch who lives in a house propped up by chicken legs, who suggests restoring Nimue to her all powerful former self by reconnecting each of her body parts. Baba Yaga knows of the secret location of where her head is housed, and once secured the awoken Nimue will reveal after 1500 years where her other body parts are located.
After falling unconscious following his battle with the three giants Hellboy comes around in the apartment of Alice Monaghan (Sasha Lane), whom he shares a connection with since her childhood, when she was kidnapped by fairies and subsequently acquired powerful skills as a medium. Bruttenholm descends upon the apartment with a SWAT Team and reveals that someone has located Nimue's remains and will more than likely find her last piece housed at the Osiris Club. Heading up the SWAT Team is M11 Agent Ben Daimio (Daniel Dae Kim), whom Hellboy now joins forces with, aided by Alice with her very own particular set of skills.
Upon arriving at the Osiris Club, the three find everyone well and truly slaughtered. Alice connects with the lifeless body of the clubs resident seer Lady Hatton (Sophie Okonedo), whose spirit is still present. Her spirit manifested through Alice reveals that Nimue has plans to find a King so that they can together raise the apocalypse. In the corridors of the building Hellboy runs into Gruagach holding onto Nimue's dismembered lower arm. Gruagach escapes however, after Hellboy is distracted by a vision of Nimue appealing to the powerful force that they could be together.
Daimio takes them to M11's headquarters, located deep underground in an old WWII bunker once used by Winston Churchill, and secretly hidden under a fish and chip shop. While Daimio secretly acquires a special bullet to kill Hellboy when the opportunity presents itself, Hellboy has a heated exchange of words with Bruttonholm over his 'adoption' and upbringing. Dissatisfied with the answer, Hellboy leaves but is magically transported to Baba Yaga's house - the one that walks on chicken legs. In exchange for an eye, the ancient witch reveals the location where Nimue plans to restore herself - the site of an ancient oak tree high up on craggy outcrop at Pendle Hill - the very place where she was slain by King Arthur and Merlin centuries ago. Hellboy reneges on the agreement to give up an eye, and Baba Yaga curses him.
At Pendle Hill Nimue has assembled with Gruagach and her coven of witches which she kills all but one. Hellboy, Alice and Daimio make haste for Pendle Hill only to be confronted by an army of the dead rising up to thwart them. Leaving Alice and Daimio to fend off their undead attackers, Hellboy makes haste to the old oak tree, where he is subdued by Nimue. In making her escape after Alice and Daimio arrive, Nimue poisons Alice with a thorn taken from her crown.
The three return to M11 headquarters, where they find everyone dead and Bruttenholm missing. They reach St Paul's Cathedral, where Nimue is in hiding, and to be confronted by Gruagach. Daimio, who earlier revealed to Alice that when he was a soldier deep in some dense jungle territory tracking down a man hunting animal that he was the sole survivor of a were-jaguar attack which left him permanently scarred to his face. Seeing Hellboy and Graugach go head to head, Daimio transforms into his jaguar form and jumps to support Hellboy in the fight. Nimue kills Graugach and then pleads with Hellboy to side with her.
After he refuses, she sends him crashing down into a hidden crypt, revealing King Arthur's tomb and Excalibur, partially encased in stone. After Nimue kills Bruttenholm, Hellboy pulls Excalibur, causing him to assume his true form. Nimue further appeals to Hellboy, but Alice channels Bruttenholm's spirit, who manifests itself and appeals to Hellboy's inner sense of humanity. Hellboy then decapitates Nimue, sending all the demons and Nimue's head back to the very depths of hell. Hellboy and Bruttenholm exchange their final farewells, and Daimio tosses away the bullet he had manufactured to kill Hellboy.
Lobster Johnson (Thomas Haden Church) is a vigilante who has a reputation for violence, such as killing mobsters and burning his trademark lobster claw symbol into their foreheads with the palm of his gloved hand. Lobster was there when the Nazi's summonsed the young Hellboy in the closing days of WWII, and helped thwart, together with Trevor Bruttonholm, the Nazi's plan. The ghost of Lobster also appears to Hellboy in a mid credits sequence as he mourns his late father by his graveside comforted by a bottle of his favourite whisky. Watch out too for an end credits scene involving Baba Yaga.
I have to say that I was underwhelmed by this version of 'Hellboy'. Once you get past the extreme violence, the viscera, the entrails, the blood, guts and gore, the hacked limbs, the gouged eyes and the almost relentless carnage which I guess is all delivered in the context of a mightily pissed off demonic centuries old queen, the storyline here is disjointed, most of the humour fails to land, and ultimately it's all (CGI rendered) style over substance. The film moves along at a frenetic pace from one action set piece to the next giving the viewer hardly time to catch up on the plot with its gaping holes and impossible time lines. David Harbour puts in a convincing performance as does Milla Jovovich and Daniel Dae Kim, but I am left wondering what Ian McShane was thinking, and the CGI and creature effects are mostly delivered well, but those are the only redeeming features in this sub-par offering when compared to del Toro's earlier offerings.
'Hellboy' merits two claps of the Odeon Online clapperboard from a possible five.
-Steve, at Odeon Online-
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