THE NORTHMAN : Tuesday 26th April 2022.

Having this week returned from a break in England, which should explain my absence from this Blog for the past month or so, I saw the MA15+ Rated 'THE NORTHMAN' at my local independent movie theatre earlier this week. Directed, Co-Produced and Co-Written by Robert Eggers whose previous two feature films were 'The Witch' in 2015 and 'The Lighthouse' in 2019, this epic historical action film cost US$90M to produce and has so far garnered largely widespread critical acclaim, having thus far recouped US$27M. Following its World Premier showcasing in Stockholm on 28th March, advance screenings we held in certain cities in early April before its wide release (including Australia and the US) from last week onwards. Normal service of my Blog BTW, will be resumed form next week onwards. 

The film opens up with a number of Viking longboats sailing towards a remote windswept island upon which sits a settlement. It is A.D.895 and the returning King Aurvandill War-Raven (Ethan Hawke) is welcomed back triumphantly with the riches he has pillaged from various overseas lands. He is met by his wife, the Queen Gudrun (Nicole Kidman) and his young son and heir Prince Amleth (Oscar Novak). Also in the returning party is Fjolnir (Claes Bang), Aurvandill's younger brother and Amleth's uncle. Later on Aurvandill and Amleth take part in a spiritual ceremony that marks Amleths passage into manhood. The ceremony is overseen by Aurvandill's jester Heimir (Willem Dafoe). 

The next morning as father and son are exiting the place of the ceremony, several warriors on horseback all descend upon the King wounding him with arrows and spears. Fjolnir is among them as the leader of the pack, and ultimately beheads Aurvandill. Having hidden behind a rock nearby and witnessed the slaying of his father, his village massacred and his mother taken away screaming by his uncle, Amleth flees the island by row boat repeatedly uttering the words 'I will avenge my father, save my mother and kill my uncle'. 

We then fast forward to years later and the now adult Amleth (Alexander Skarsgard) is rowing a Viking longboat down river in the land of Rus. It seems that he was found by a band of Vikings and raised among them as a berserker. After a bloody attack on a village, Amleth comes across a Seeress (Bjork) in the temple of Svetovit. She predicts that Amleth will exact out his revenge on Fjolnir. Amleth learns that Fjolnir was overthrown by Harald of Norway and now lives in exile in Iceland. Amleth sneaks aboard a slave ship headed for Iceland. Posing as a slave, he encounters a Slavic slave named Olga of the Birch Forest (Anya Taylor-Joy), who lays claim to being a sorceress. Upon arrival, Amleth and the other slaves are shackled and taken to Fjolnir's farm, where it is revealed that Queen Gudrun, now Fjolnir's wife, has borne him a son, Gunnar (Elliott Rose).

One night, Amleth flees the farm and comes across a He-Witch (Ingvar Eggert Sigurosson), who facilitates a spiritual discussion between Amleth and the late Heimir, revealed to have been murdered by Fjolnir by gouging out his eyes, cutting out his tongue and slicing off his ears while he still lived. He then tells Amleth about Night Blade, a magical sword that can only be drawn at night, and its whereabouts, which Amleth later obtains through fighting and overcoming an undead spirit for the sword.

The next day Amleth is chosen to compete in a game of knattleikr. Needless to say this is a brutal and bloody game which turns violent and Amleth saves Gunnar, who runs to play, from the rival team's champion Thorfinnr (Hafþor Julius Bjornsson). Amleth wrestles Thorfinnr to the ground and repeatedly heads butts his opponent until his skull cracks open. As a reward, Thorir (Gustav Lindt), Fjolnir's eldest and adult son allows Amleth to claim Olga as his wife and makes him a supervisor over the other slaves, but warns him that he will never be free of a life of slavery himself. 

During the celebrations later that same evening, Amleth and Olga make love. They commit to work together to overthrow Fjolnir and his men. Over the ensuing nights, Amleth kills a number of Fjolnir's men. Olga meanwhile mixes the men's food with magic mushrooms, causing them all to hallucinate, so allowing Amleth to enter Fjolnir's house. There he meets his mother, Gudrun, who tells him that she was originally taken into slavery, and that Amleth was the result of rape. She also reveals that it was her order for Fjolnir to kill Aurvandill and Amleth, and that she prefers Fjolnir and her new son Gunnar. Amleth leaves, distraught and angered and promptly kills Thorir in his sleep and rips out his heart. 

Fjolnir is determined to find his son's killer and promptly begins slicing the throats of random slaves if they don't give him the answer he is looking for. He threatens to kill Olga, resulting in Amleth revealing himself as responsible and trading Olga's life for Thorir's heart. Amleth is taken captive, strung up and severely beaten to within an inch of his life. Amleth is released from his restraints by a flock of ravens who peck away at his bindings. Olga rescues Amleth from the farm and the two escape, planning to go to Amleth's kin on Orkney island. Departing Iceland by boat, Amleth kisses a wound on Olga's throat, caused by the knife held to her neck previously by Fjolnir. This triggers a vision that she is pregnant with twins, and believing that his children will never be safe as long as Fjolnir lives, Amleth, against Olga's wishes, determines to finally kill Fjolnir and jumps overboard and swims back to shore.

Back at the farm, under cover of darkness, Amleth frees the slaves and kills the majority of Fjolnir's men. The slaves burn the farm down to the ground. While looking for Fjolnir, Amleth is attacked by Gudrun and, after, by Gunnar. Amleth defends himself, but, in the ensuing melee, kills both, but is seriously wounded from multiple stab wounds. Fjolnir discovers the bodies and arranges a fight to the death with Amleth at the Gates of Hel—the actively spewing volcano Hekla, to resolve their conflict. At the volcano, the pair engage in a fierce swordfight, resulting in Fjolnir being decapitated and Amleth fatally wounded. As Amleth lies dying, he has a future vision of Olga embracing their twin children safe on Orkney, and sees his ascent on horseback to Valhalla.

'The Northman' will not be a film for everyone, which probably explains the lacklustre Box Office performance (as at the time of writing), but having said that I don't think that Director Robert Eggers is too worried about that given the overwhelming critical acclaim the film has generated. For me, I certainly was entertained and thoroughly engaged for the duration of the 135 minute run time by the authenticity of the production values that Eggers insisted on, the storyline (which while simple enough is hardly complex but engrossing nonetheless), the strong cast of A-list talent, and the brutality and blood soaked violence of the Viking era where life meant so much less than it does today. All of that said, the film does labour at times and the VFX of Amleth's family tree branching out from his heart with passing images of his ancestors and ultimately his own children felt clunky and somewhat ill paced. Despite these minor observations however, Eggers continues to demonstrate his ability over his craft and this time with a much more sizeable budget that expands on the historical worlds he created in his two previous cinematic outings and offers the viewer an original gripping story that alas, we see far too little of today. 

'The Northman' merits four claps of the Odeon Online clapperboard from a potential five claps.

-Steve, at Odeon Online-

LOCKED DOWN : Tuesday 11th May 2021.

'LOCKED DOWN' is an M Rated romantic comedy heist film which I saw earlier this week. Directed by Doug Liman whose prior film making credits include 'Swingers', 'The Bourne Identity', 'Mr. & Mrs. Smith', 'Edge of Tomorrow', 'American Made' and 'Chaos Walking' most recently. The screenplay was written by Steven Knight in July 2020, financed, and filmed entirely during the COVID-19 pandemic over just an eighteen day period in October 2020 for a budget of about US$3M. The film was released in the US on HBO Max in January 2021, and has garnered mixed or average Reviews so far.

And so here, Linda (Anne Hathaway) and Paxton (Chiwetel Ejiofor) are locked down during the COVID-19 pandemic in their very cosy modern terrace house somewhere in London, sometime in the first half of 2020. They are a disgruntled couple who have agreed to go their separate ways once the lock down is over, for reasons of having grown apart after ten years together, although the stimulus for the break-up seems to rest more with Linda who has grown weary of Paxton's lack of enthusiasm, lack of focus and constant down at heal, woe is me attitude. For while Linda has climbed the corporate ladder to become the UK CEO of a very successful fashion company, Paxton has struggled to find meaningful work for the last ten years since he was arrested and charged with assault. As a result, his only work is that of a delivery driver, at which he has been furloughed because of the lock down. Paxton is forced to sell his beloved motorbike which he sees as an extension to himself, to make ends meet. 

On a Zoom call with Paxton's half-brother David (Dule Hill) and his wife Maria (Jazmyn Simon) in the US, Linda breaks the news of their pending separation, and we also learn that at some point in the recent past both Linda and Maria got it on together in a wine induced one night stand, which remains a secret between them, and which Linda would rather forget, but not so it seems on Maria's part. Linda meanwhile sets up a Zoom call with four of her UK based senior management team to advise them all that they are being terminated with immediate effect because of the economic downturn and the business being unable to sustain their positions moving forward, although in reality that decision was made pre-pandemic back in December at a company junket in Paris. 

One day while Paxton is feeling especially sorry for himself, his boss Malcolm (Ben Kingsley) calls him with the offer of three days work for £200 per day cash as a driver for high value deliveries, due to the limited number of drivers currently being available. The only catch is that Paxton will have to go under an assumed name because of his prior criminal record. He needs to make a snap decision there and then on the spot, which he does so reluctantly on the condition that Malcolm promotes him afterwards to an office based administrative role, after numerous years of dead end driving. Malcolm says that he'll have his fake security ID and name tag sent over to his home tomorrow (Wednesday) for his first collection from Selfridges on Thursday, Harvey Nichols on Friday and Harrods on Saturday. 

On Wednesday Malcolm contacts Paxton saying the he texted him his assumed name and that the security ID and name badge are on their way over. Paxton retrieves his new identity to discover that he has been given the name of Edgar Allen Poe, as was suggested by Martin (Sam Spruell) a Co-Worker of his who has spent the last seven years working in dispatch and there is absolutely no love lost between the two. Paxton is none too pleased with having to front up with the name of a famous 19th Century American poet and writer, but agrees to proceed nonetheless, surmising that todays 'kids' working security won't have heard of Edgar Allen Poe anyway. Meanwhile, Linda is on a Zoom call with her boss Guy (Ben Stiller) who is locked down in the Vermont countryside in the US together with the other CEO's from around the world. Guy offers her a new position back home in the United States to which she is taken aback and stalls her decision making process until after lock down has lifted to buy herself some time. 

Linda is tasked with clearing out her firms inventory from Harrods on Saturday evening, as there is now no-one else able to complete the task. After arriving home after his first pick up and drop off on Thursday, Paxton reveals that he has a job at Harvey Nichols on Friday and Harrods on Saturday. Linda quickly comes to the conclusion that their delivery schedules at the store overlap, and Paxton would not get past the security protocols that Linda set up three years prior when she worked there. Linda on Friday organises a call with the new Head of Security at Harrods, Michael Morgan (Stephen Merchant) who brings in her former co-worker Kate (Mindy Kaling) who paves the ways for Linda's almost uninterrupted access to the department store after hours the next day. 

Linda discloses to Paxton that there is a £3M diamond in the vault at Harrods that has been sold to an anonymous buyer, and the store keeps a duplicate on-display. That anonymous buyer Linda learns from Essien (Claes Bang) the owner of the company she works for, is a drug dealing, money laundering, probably murdering international criminal king-pin, and once the diamond is returned to a vault on New York's Wall Street will probably remain untouched and unseen by anyone for years. And so Linda and Paxton agree to take the real diamond for themselves and send the fake one to the buyer in New York City, splitting the sale between themselves and the National Health Service, three ways equally at £1M each. 

Upon making it to the famed Knightsbridge department store on Saturday evening, both under separate cover, Linda meets with former co-worker Charlotte (Lucy Boynton) at the security check in, with Paxton waiting outside to be ushered in. After some very loose checking in procedures, Linda and Paxton (Edgar Allen Poe) make their way to Harrods famed food hall which is being cleared out and closed down. There they help themselves to all the lavish ingredients for a £5K picnic up on the rooftop of the store before 7:30pm and their designated time for collection of the inventory and the diamond. 

Linda and Paxton retrieve the diamond from the vault and swap it out with the fake. However, they are confronted by Donald (Mark Gatiss), a former co-worker of Linda's she fired earlier in the week. Donald had alerted the Police after learning of Paxton's fake identity. Linda reveals their plan, and Donald agrees to lie for them, out of respect and love for Linda and being anti-establishment (especially at this time!). 

In exiting the store, a repeated message comes across the internal Public Address system for Edgar Allen Poe to return to the security gate immediately. Fearing the worst that the Police are lying in wait, the pair make a hurried dash for a security guarded rear entrance when Security Guard Mark (Marek Larwood) approaches brandishing Paxton's security ID that he left earlier at the main entrance, and promptly hands it over saying that he'll need it to gain access to Heathrow to put the diamond on the plane to New York. Linda and Paxton breathe a sigh of relief, and ride off into the night on Paxton's motorbike home via Heathrow Airport. 

The pair, who originally had planned to go their separate ways post lockdown, decide to reevaluate their relationship, now that they are each £1M better off and the burden of money woes, and both being stuck in jobs from which they gained no satisfaction, is effectively over. Then, on Paxton's birthday, the COVID lockdown is extended by another two weeks.

On the plus side 'Locked Down' works because of the chemistry and obvious good time that our two principle Actors, Hathaway and Ejiofor, clearly had during the making of this film, and watching a bunch of other A-listers phone in it via Zoom calls - Stiller, Bang, Kingsley and Merchant all adds a weight to the proceedings which should not be under estimated. The zeitgeist too is captured pretty well too with businesses shuttered, company layoffs, working from home, forced isolation, Zoom technical challenges, pot-clanging tributes, and the frustrations, anxieties and boredom of being holed up for two weeks and more in a confined space with the same person. On the down side the film really labours the ever declining relationship between Linda and Paxton during the first two-thirds, and then seems to remember that somewhere in the plot there is a diamond heist that needs to be crammed into the remaining third, and when it comes it is so underwhelmingly delivered and hurriedly conceived that it feels like an afterthought. But then I guess to write a script, get it financed and green lit, amass a cast and crew, go into production, shoot, edit and release a major motion picture in just about six months flat speaks volumes about what Director Doug Liman has been able to pull off, but also is telling as to what this film might have been given more time. It's not a great film, but it's also not that bad either.

'Locked Down' merits three claps of the Odeon Online clapperboard from a possible five claps.

-Steve, at Odeon Online-

THE BURNT ORANGE HERESY : Tuesday 28th July 2020.

'THE BURNT ORANGE HERESY' which I saw earlier in the week is an MA15+ Rated drama thriller Directed by Giuseppe Capotondi who has helmed numerous music videos over the years, television commercials and a small number of TV series and feature films. This film adaptation is based on the 1971 book of the same name by Charles Willeford and was chosen as the closing film for last years Venice International Film Festival and went on release in the US on 6th March and was then pulled when the world went into COVID-19 lockdown. It was re-released a couple of weeks ago now in Australia and is scheduled for a re-run in US theatres from 7th August, has generated mixed or average Reviews and has so far grossed US$208K.

The film opens up with ambitious and charming art critic, James Figueras (Claes Bang) who has fallen from grace somewhat and now spends his time lecturing rich American tourists into the why's and wherefore's of the art world around many Italian cities famed for their artworks.  He's happy to bend the truth by incorporating a series of convincingly told fabrications to demonstrate the power that art critics can have upon the unsuspecting admirer or purchaser, but comes clean in the end with his rouse when the lecture is over and his American customers are bidding their thanks and farewells.

All except Berenice Hollis (Elizabeth Debicki) who hangs back because of the free chips on offer, and because they seem to share a chemistry. That chemistry soon lands the pair in the sack together in Figueras' Milan apartment. Having learnt that Figueras was a failed art student who was advised to go into art journalism by his teacher, and that Hollis hails from a small town south of Duluth, Minnesota where an indiscretion with a married teacher has meant she is on forced leave for an extended period, there is little else we know about their back stories.

Following their night of passion Figueras invites his new love interest to the Lake Como home of wealthy art dealer Joseph Cassidy (Mick Jagger), who has contacted Figueras and extended an invitation for him to spend the weekend, for reasons that are as yet unclear. Upon arrival at the palatial home, the pair are escorted up to their room and told to make themselves available in one hour for lunch. Over lunch the three get acquainted, and taking coffee out on the verandah overlooking Lake Como, Cassidy announces that residing in a small cottage on the edge of the estate is renowned and very reclusive artist Jerome Debney (Donald Sutherland) who has not been interviewed for the past fifty years. Cassidy invites Figueras to break that drought, on one condition.

And that one condition, is that Figueras 'procures' a Debney artwork for his own collection, no questions asked, otherwise Figueras goes home empty handed and Cassidy will expose some dirt he has on the art critic from his past. Figueras reluctantly agrees although has no idea how is going to get his hands on a Debney painting without paying a princely sum for, or without the artist knowing about it. The first hurdle however, is getting the reclusive artist to agree to an interview.

The next morning while idling by the pool, along saunters Debney and the three strike up a conversation. By now Cassidy has had to fly out of town leaving Figueras and Hollis to make the most of the weekend and have the run of the estate. Debney is instantly taken with Hollis, and he agrees to let Figueras interview him if he can swim two lengths of the swimming pool under water, which he does, of course. Debney then sets out his agenda for the day which includes a boat ride later that afternoon and dinner that evening in his cottage, during which time they will engage in conversation rather than a formal interview.

For the boat ride across the lake Figueras makes his apologies saying that he needs to rest up, so deputising to Hollis to accompany Debney. Figueras has an ulterior motive naturally, and while the pair are away enjoying each others company, he attempts to break in to Debney's very secure cottage, albeit unsuccessfully. We have also learned subsequently that Debney has no surviving art works from his earlier years as these were all destroyed in two fires - the first at his home, and the second years later at a gallery which housed his collection. He then went into self imposed hiding and barely no one has seen him, or his paintings, for the past fifty years.

Later that evening having talked and eaten Figueras asks Debney if he can see his art work collection. Debney at first is offended by the request stating that it is his choice not to show the world his paintings and they are private works, but Figueras counters this with better the world to see his collection while he is still alive, than to have free rein when he is dead and ransack his work when he is no longer around to defend it. Reluctantly Debney agrees and takes them into a secure locked studio fitted out with unopened tubes of paint, brushes, blank canvases, easels, more blank canvases and more still. There is not a single painting in the whole room. Figueras, who was hoping to 'procure' a painting in an unguarded moment when on cue Hollis would drop her drink glass, is left dumbfounded and astounded by this revelation. Hollis happens to notice on the reverse side of a canvas the title of the supposed painting 'The Burnt Orange Heresy', and upon enquiring Debney responds that the title is just meant to fool anyone who comes looking. Figueras goes outside to catch his breath, and is joined by Hollis and Debney moments later. Debney takes his leave saying that he has a date with an older lady and he cannot leave her waiting and so bids them both farewell.

In walking back to the villa Figueras realises that he has left his laptop and satchel back at the cottage. He tells Hollis to pack their bags as they are leaving immediately. He walks back to the cottage to retrieve his laptop and satchel alone. There he forcibly breaks in, and re-enters Debney's studio. He bundles a whole bunch of paint tubes into his satchel, together with some brushes. He then takes the blank canvas with the inscription 'The Burnt Orange Heresy' written on the reverse and wraps this inside a towel. Next he upturns all the blank canvases, easels, rips up sheets of paper and then squirts a flammable paint thinner all around the room and then sets light to the room. He makes a quick exit as the cottage is very quickly engulfed in flames. He arrives back at the villa before Hollis appears with their bags, by which time he has bundled the blank canvas into the boot of his Range Rover out of sight. They then drive through the night back to Milan.

Hollis slumps exhausted on the bed, while Figueras says he going to start work on his interview notes while its still fresh in his memory. While Hollis sleeps Figueras retrieves the paints, brushes and blank canvas from his car, and sets them up in his office. The phone rings and it is Cassidy enquiring about the fire at his property and whether he was successful in securing a Debney painting before the place burnt to the ground. Figueras answers in the affirmative and Cassidy responds asking him to describe the painting to him which is called 'The Burnt Orange Heresy'. Cassidy much to his joy further adds that he is now the owner of the only Debney painting anywhere in existence since all of his other works burnt in the fire. When Cassidy hangs up, Figueras begins painting his own interpretation of 'The Burnt Orange Heresy' duly signing it with Debney's signature once complete.

Hollis wakes up later and ventures into the office and sees the still wet painting, touching the wet paint with her fingertip. She goes into the bathroom and confronts Figueras. Running a bath, the pair argue, and needless to say it doesn't end well for Hollis. Shortly after the fire, the art world mourns the loss of Debney who died of a heart attack. Sometime later, Figueras has written a book - a retrospective of Debney which is selling like hot cakes, and in New York at Cassidy's Gallery, the pair are seen schmoozing with the who's who of the art world and celebrating 'The Burnt Orange Heresy' which is there on display for all the world to see as Debney's sole surviving painting. One art critic remarks to Figueras that she finds it amazing that Debney had the foresight to leave his fingerprint slap bang in the middle of his artwork, which he had overlooked completely and reels away in horror. Cassidy makes some comments about the whereabouts of Hollis, who has mysteriously disappeared and states that Debney was found in the swimming pool of the villa, face down, drowned. Cassidy also tells Figueras that shortly before his death, Debney sent a sketch to Hollis' mother in Duluth, but as it wasn't signed it is worthless. The film closes out with the sketch of Hollis on her mothers fridge at their home in Duluth, beside newspaper clippings reporting on the first anniversary since her disappearance, and the camera comes to rest on Debney's signature.

Milan with its stunning architecture and Lake Como with its plush lakeside residences provide the smart sexy locations; the glamorous world of works of art, galleries, collectors, artists and critics sets the scene; intelligent dialogue; top notch performances from the four lead characters (even if Mick Jagger comes across as being out of his depth in the company of the other three acclaimed Actors) and a plot that has more surprises in store than you can keep track of, verging on the ridiculous by the time the end credits roll. The first two acts move along a good pace and will keep you riveted, but by the time the third act comes to be the imagination is stretched, all realism is lost and the believability of the pay day is forced to bring the films conclusion to a hastily delivered ending. The film certainly looks the part and there is a real chemistry between Debicki, Bang and Sutherland on screen - it's just a shame that their characters are not more fleshed out from their brief initial introduction, and the film will leave you hanging with plenty of unanswered questions.

'The Burnt Orange Heresy' merits three claps of the Odeon Online clapperboard, out of a possible five claps.

-Steve, at Odeon Online-  

THE GIRL IN THE SPIDER'S WEB : Tuesday 13th November 2018.

'THE GIRL IN THE SPIDER'S WEB' which I saw this week, is the fourth instalment in the 'Millennium' series of novels and films. This film franchise first kicked off with the originator of the international best seller series Stieg Larsson who penned 'The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo', 'The Girl Who Played with Fire' and 'The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest' - all of which were made into successful films in their native Sweden, launching the movie career of Noomi Rapace as lead character Lisbeth Salander in those first three films. In 2011, David Fincher made an American version of the first film starring Rooney Mara as Lisbeth Salander and Daniel Craig as Mikael Blomkvist as an investigative journalist and occasional lover to Salander. When Stieg Larsson died in 2004 aged 50, having completed the three novels, David Lagercrantz carried the torch having penned two follow on novels so far, the first of which continues with this instalment. This time Directed by Fede Alvarez whose previous Directing credits include the 2013 version of 'Evil Dead' and  2016's 'Don't Breathe'. The film saw its Premier at the Rome Film Festival in late October, cost US$43M to make and has so far recovered US$18M, was released in Sweden at the end of October, was released here in Australia and in the US last week and has so far received generally mixed or average Reviews.

And so to the story. The film opens with the young child Lisbeth and her sister Camilla playing a game of chess on the floor of her fathers snow fortress home somewhere in the foothills of Stockholm. A servant enters the room where they play and commands that the girls go see their father in his bedroom. In making their way down the corridor, a heavily tattooed naked woman is seen walking into another room. Their father insists that the girls join him on his bed, as he unbuttons his shirt. It is clear that at this point that his intentions are far from honourable. Lisbeth hangs back as Camilla approaches her father. Lisbeth wants nothing of this and in a moment of distraction throws herself off the balcony and into a blizzard. Surviving the fall on an embankment of freshly fallen snow, the young Lisbeth is seen running off into the forest below. She chooses not to venture back to the house as long as her father remains alive.

We then fast forward twenty or so years to the present day. We are in an ultra modern apartment overlooking the Stockholm skyline. Lisbeth Salander (Claire Foy) is lurking in the shadows of the library, and has come to the rescue of an abused wife from her wealthy, successful and respected businessman husband, who has just beaten her bloody and is now trying to make up to her as she lays on the floor propped up against a kitchen bench. Lisbeth dressed in black with a hoodie and white make up contrasting her eyes appears as an avenging angel against the backdrop of a statue in the darkened room. Pretty quickly she has trussed the husband up in a wire lasso and has him dangling upside down from the ceiling. Meanwhile, she has hacked into his bank account and proceeds to empty it distributing his wealth in favour of his wife and child, and the two prostitutes he previously beat up, and which she plays him back on her smart phone, threatening to go public with the footage if he dare to come after her, or is wife and child ever again.

A few days later, dismissed from the National Security Agency, Frans Balder (Stephen Merchant) recruits expert hacker Lisbeth to steal 'FireFall', a computer programme that can access codes for nuclear weapons worldwide from a single device, and which he developed in the first place. He has come to realise that it's really not such a clever idea to leave FireFall unattended in the hands of the U.S. government, and so wants it destroyed. Lisbeth, using her advanced IT hacking skills is able to move the programme from the NSA's tightly guarded and high security computer vault. However, accessing the programme once it is in her possession is no easy feat, involving the answering of very cryptic questions, that we learn later on that Balders six year old savant son August (Christopher Convery) only has the answers to.

Edwin Needham (LaKeith Stanfield) is a former computer hacker of some repute and has now turned specialist techie geek for the NSA, and he traces the opening of FireFall to Stockholm. So off he jets on the next available flight. Upon landing he is picked up by the Swedish Secret Service authorities and told in no certain terms by Gabriella Grane (Synnove Macody Lund), the Deputy Director, to keep out of their business and that he has no jurisdiction other than being a tourist, and any contravention will result in his immediate deportation back from whence he came. Of course he ignores this directive immediately and goes off in search of Lisbeth.

Meanwhile, Lisbeth is living in secret in an abandoned warehouse, replete with all her computer gadgets and wizardry that enables her to hack her way into any computer system anywhere in the world with just a couple of clicks . . . a skill that more than proves its worth on multiple occasions throughout the film. Whilst relaxing in her bath however, her apartment is broken into by a group of unscrupulous masked men looking for the programme, who end up torching her digs in a ball of fire. Lisbeth, naturally survives although not unscathed, and has recorded the antagonists down to her computer located in her fire and explosion proof panic room. As for the rest of the apartment, it is well and truly torched.

As Lisbeth quickly salvages what she can from the burnt out ruins of her former abode, the Police begin to arrive to check on all the commotion. Lisbeth rides out on her motorbike and is chased along the waterfront by three Police cars in hot pursuit, but she is able to make her getaway across a frozen river.

With her computer containing the FireFall programme now in the hands of some nefarious underworld organisation, Lisbeth turns to her old friend Michael Blomkvist (Sverrir Gudnason) to get handy with some deep diving investigative work to uncover the masked perpetrators. Meanwhile she sets up covert surveillance of Balders safe house expecting that those perpetrators will eventually hunt him out wanting the access code. In the meantime, Blomkvist has traced one of the masked men through a distinctive spider tattoo, and has learned that 'The Spiders' are the secretive powerful and often violent Russian outfit behind Lisbeth's woes.

Via the covert surveillance camera placed strategically overlooking the Balder residence, Lisbeth is able to see the Russians infiltrating the household, brutally killing the guards on security duty and soon enough too Frans, taking August prisoner and setting up a drugged up Lisbeth to make it look as though she shot Frans through the head at very close range. Able to execute a fairly swift getaway, although only semi-conscious, Lisbeth recovers her senses and gives chase in an unmarked Police car. After a high speed car chase involving hand brake turns, wheel spins and jumps she eventually rescues the young lad from the clutches of them pesky no good Russians and leaves them high and dry on an elevated snow covered bridge, with Lisbeth on one side glaring at her evil long lost believed dead sister Camilla (Sylvia Hoeks).

Decamping to a secret hideaway on the outskirts of the city, Lisbeth and August make off in a hacked Lamborghini. They meet up with Blomkvist there, but within 24 hours Camilla and her Spider cohorts arrive and take back August. In the meantime, Needham has been arrested at the scene of the crime at the Balder household and Grane promptly orders that he be shipped back to 'Disneyland' post haste. Lisbeth goes to the airport to retrieve Needham from his heavy security entourage and does so by hacking into every surveillance camera, every electronic door locking device and every possible security measure to make his exit from there as easy and as fast as possible.

Arriving back afterwards with Needham safe elsewhere, Lisbeth is greeted by Camilla and her henchmen, and an unconscious Blomkvist. Once again there is a scuffle as Lisbeth and Blomkvist's lives are threatened, but she is able to escape, but not before the Spiders make off with August. With Blomkvist, Lisbeth visits Plague (Cameron Britton) a close associate of hers and a computer expert, where Needham is also holed out. Lisbeth is instantly able to trace August's location through a tracking device she planted on him earlier in the day.

Camilla and crew make for her childhood home, which now sits empty and run down. Inside, Camilla has set up camp with all the hi-tech gadgetry and computer screens necessary to unleash FireFall on an unsuspecting world. August is bound and tied in a separate room. She sneaks her way in, hacking the security cameras for Plague who is parked in his surveillance van down the road. Lisbeth makes reasonable progress through the house thwarting various bad dudes, but Camilla has anticipated her arrival and has set a trap for Lisbeth, which she falls into but not before putting up a fight.

When Lisbeth comes around she is kneeling on the floor with her hands tied behind her back, and in front of her sits August. Camilla orders Lisbeth to command August to reveal the access code to his fathers FireFall question. Seeing the situation as being hopeless and with a particularly nasty injection aimed squarely at a now also captive Blomkvist, Lisbeth says to August to release the code. And this he does, and within a few minutes FireFall goes live. Camilla then promptly wraps up Lisbeth in a black latex sack and sucks all the air out of it, so slowly suffocating her sister who by now resembles a vacuum packed bag of chicken portions. Meanwhile Needham has set up a sniper position with a high powered long range rifle and is dependant on Plague giving him the coordinates of the henchmen within the house. One by one Needham with a carefully trained eye takes out the unsuspecting henchmen through windows, walls and doors. Camilla, leaves her sister to suffocate slowly in her vacuum sealed confines, as she makes a fast exit.

Driving out of there at speed in a Maserati but with her computer at her side, Camilla believes she is in the clear, when the car hits a blinded Jan Holster (Claes Bang), Camilla's trusted accomplice and deliverer of very bad deeds. The car spins out of control, veers off the road and crashes into the trees. Lisbeth arrives having made her escape from the confines of her latex wrapping to find the driver dead, and Camilla's bloodied hand print on the back seat, but the door open and no sign of her.

Not before long Lisbeth has caught up with Camilla limping through the forest clutching her computer and bleeding heavily from her side. She veers up a rocky outcrop with the house in the distance. The pair exchange words, as tears well in both their eyes. As Lisbeth lowers her gun, Camilla throws down the computer onto the snow and steps back off the cliff edge falling to her death below. Needham arrives to find no sigh of Lisbeth, but the computer lying still in the snow. He opens the laptop to reveal a message from Lisbeth, that she has moved the FireFall programme as it is what Balder wanted. Mission : Accomplished! Needham makes good on his promise to Lisbeth for engineering his escape from the authorities by returning August safely to his mother in San Francisco.

The opening credits sequence of 'The Girl in the Spiders Web' reminded me a lot of the opening titles sequence in just about every Bond movie, which kinda set the tone for the rest of the film. Here Lisbeth Salander is a mash up of a feminine hard hitting Bond or Bourne, and a black clad superhero who gets kicked, punched, drugged, stabbed, gassed, blown up, shot at and vacuum packed but every time manages to bounce right back and kick more ass in the process. And the relative ease with which Lisbeth is able to hack into the seemingly most advanced computer systems with just a couple of clicks and faster that you can say 'computer hacker extraordinare' seems completely incongruous. The plot is repetitive in places and therefore becomes a tad predictable, but all that said Claire Foy makes for a respectable Lisbeth in her third big screen outing this year after 'Unsane' and 'First Man'. The action set pieces are delivered with imagination, but the character of Blomkvist is here sidelined as is his Millennium publication, and in penning this story the writer/screenwriters seem to have lost their way compared to the set up that Larsson so expertly and emotionally charged his character with. This is a good movie, but its not a great movie. On the strength of this instalment however, I would be easily persuaded to venture back to my local Odeon for the next Lagercrantz instalment 'The Girl Who Takes an Eye for an Eye', which hopefully Claire Foy will return for.

'The Girl in the Spiders Web' merits three claps of the Odeon Online clapperboard, from a  potential five.

-Steve, at Odeon Online-